Hi. My name is Mindy, and I am an Olympic-aholic. 

For weeks I have been looking forward to seeing those rings on NBC and hearing the "Dum dum da dum dum dum da dum dum dum dum"(if you can't hear the song when you read those words, you need to watch some Olympic coverage). In order to prepare for and build my own excitement for the opening ceremony I painted my nails to start getting in the Olympic spirit.

Finally, the big day rolled around and I decided to dress accordingly for the opening ceremony; ready to cheer on my country. 

My sister made me pose for a pic saying,
"I need to capture this.  My sister in full swing.  Yup that's my sister".
She gets quite a kick out of my style sometimes.

Now that the opening ceremony is over and the events have begun, I'm not going to lie- I'm kind of like a kid in the candy store when the Olympics are on.  I get all sorts of excited at the idea of watching all the different events.  I was pretty excited today because I was able to bring a portable tv for my desk to watch the Olympics while at work.  No complaints here.  

I am not sure when it all began, but I definitely have an addiction to the Olympics. There's something extremely beautiful about watching the world come together in one place, even if it is to compete against each other in athletic events. Besides my love for sports, especially volleyball, maybe underneath it all it's the idea of a sample of all of God's people coming together in a peaceful manner. While watching the opening ceremony my sister commented, "I bet God loves the Olympics... I bet He's proud." Well wouldn't he be? I mean sure, competing against each other can end up getting a little ugly if people get upset or mean or something. But overall, it's pretty cool that people from all over the world are in one place. It's like a tiny sample of what heaven will be like right? A melting pot of every country come together for the same great purpose.

Regardless of whether it's my love for sports, or the coming together of all the countries- I am hopelessly in love with the Olympics.  There is something nostalgic or comforting about the voice of Bob Costas, or the sound of the Olympic theme song.  I'm quite excited for the days and nights left of quality time spent in front of the TV living vicariously through these athletes who compete to be the Best at what they do.  As the torch goes out in 2 weeks, it will be a sad moment until excitement re-builds and we come together again to watch the world compete in the winter Olympics in 2014.

So tonight... go home, spend some time with Bob Costas and join me in my love for the Olympics.
 

I'm sitting on the floor in my bedroom with the "smoking porch" (as I call it, aka tiny tiny balcony fit for a smoker to stand out on) door wide open, just listening to the rain.  It's 1:49 in the morning and I am so so thankful for the sound of the raindrops hitting the pavement; the sound of them beating on the leaves of the trees just out my window.  It has been weeks and weeks since we have had rain.  Fires were starting all over the place.  But here again, God provides.  He knows exactly what our land needs, what we need, and he provides because He is faithful.  

Based on previous posts or the About Me section of my blog, you can see that I am a newly married woman (of already 8 months at this point).  And so you might think, "what are you doing up at almost 2 in the morning? Why aren't you in bed sleeping next to your husband?"  Well unfortunately you will find me, right next to you asking this same question; seriously why am I not in bed sleeping soundly next to my new husband?  

As I sit here listening to the beautiful sound of the rain, it is hard to, on one hand, feel so angry, and on the other hand, so appreciative and so IN LOVE with the way that God is providing this rain.  I have been doing my best to keep my frustrations at bay, and not publish them on my blog.  But at the same time, from the beginning, I told myself that the purpose of this blog would not be for the people who happen to stumble across my page, but for myself.  I started this blog as a form of creativity; a way to discover who I am in this new place as a married woman, figuring out what life looks like and what God has for me next.  With that said, I have to be honest and say that these past few months have been difficult.  

I am, what I like to call, a "work widow."  My husband works anywhere from 90-100 hours a week.  I know when you hear that you probably want to say, yeah okay miss exaggeration. And I wish I could say, "yeah you caught me".  But I can't.  I married a man who works for an investment bank.  Not the personal investment sort, but investments dealing with companies.  Basically what his company does is acts as the middle man between the companies who want to sell and the companies who want to buy another company.  In theory, it's a great job.  It pays really well, has good benefits, and good perks.  But as a newlywed wife who wants to see her husband, it is about time I file a "formal complaint."  

Now I wish I was filing a formal complaint with his company.  Trust me, there have been so many times where I have played over and over in my head the scenario of me telling off his boss, or pictured and planned out how I would write a book that would expose how ridiculous and how inhumane this position is.  There have been so many times, especially in the past month where I have thought- "I can't do this anymore, something has to change with this job or it is seriously going to start affecting our marriage."  Let's just say that right now is one of those times.  

So as I sit here, with the door open, listening to the comforting sound of the rain and the thunder, and the beautiful flashes of lightning, I wonder to myself- how is God going to provide in my situation?  I have so much pent up frustration and disgust with the way that the business world works today... it makes me SO angry sometimes.  I have gotten into many discussions about how the business world works, about the crazy demands that people have on each other, and how it must be SO FAR away from what God intends for us that it makes me CRAZY.  

All in all, I am not sure what the point of this post is.  I don't want to talk a bunch of crap about my husband's job or about the situation I am in.  I love him to death, and I am so thankful for what we have in our lives.  But in all honesty, I am so so frustrated.  I know that God loves me, that God loves us and that he created marriage to be a beautiful thing where husband and wife get to see each other and enjoy spending time together and love on each other... but I also know that this is a fallen world.  There are many things that mess up the beautiful picture that God created this place to be.  

And so the question I ask is, what should I do from here?  Just like God provided the much needed rain tonight, I know that He will provide exactly what my husband and I need.  But in the mean time, what am I supposed to do... sit tight, waiting for the clouds to form and the drops of rain to fall?  If so, then okay- that's all I need to know.  Sometimes all we need is that promise of rain- the forecast in the weather saying, "Yes, IT IS GOING TO RAIN" for us to hang in there and wait, even if it doesn't happen right when they predict.  

That's what I feel I need.  That simple encouragement that things will get better.  That it won't always be like this.  That my righteous anger, my "formal complaint" against the business world and the ungodly way that they conduct the industry, is not in vain.  God is good.  We have a God who provides, who is faithful NO MATTER WHAT- of that I am confident.  My prayer right now is that the rain would come quickly.  That I would have an understanding, an encouragement that this time of frustration would have a foreseeable end, and that I would have nothing but patience and LOVE to extend to my husband even in the moments where all I feel is sadness.  

To those of you fellow "work widows" out there- I am praying for you.  You are not alone.  God is good and He will make it right.  

Here's what happens when you're bored with a few hours to kill.  A little something different on each finger.  

Today I was talking with a dear friend of mine about the infamous question "What is your calling?" I don't know about you, but I feel like it is one of those questions that you are asked a ton- especially right around college graduation and into your twenties as you're still figuring life out (and this could be longer, but I can only speak for the twenties so far). Yes, sure- this question could take many forms... What do you want to be when you grow up? What do you want to do with your life? What kind of job do you want? What is your "blue sky" dream? (That was my favorite version of the question- like if you could do ANYTHING what would it be?)

I feel like I have a love/hate relationship with that question. When I am talking with a good friend about this question it can be a bit more fun. It's like an opportunity to think about your dreams, about what you might want to do if there were no limits. But when that rando person, way extended relative asks, so "what is your calling?" Sometimes I just want to roll my eyes, give a heavy sigh, and maybe even punch them in the face. Okay not really- but still. That question is such a tricky one isn't it?

When I graduated college- I had no idea what I wanted to do. I chose a major and minor that I loved. I was a Religion major and a French minor at a private liberal arts college. Put those two areas of study and what do you get? Well- other than me, I'm not sure. It definitely doesn't lead directly into a field like a teacher or a nurse does.

But there is one aspect of that infamous question that I have known my entire life, and that is living my life to love the Lord. When I was really little and people would ask the question "What do you want to do/be when you grow up?" I would always answer- well, I want to do something for God and I want to help people. To be honest, I'd like to (and still do) respond like this today. Really, nothing has changed in that answer. The only thing that has changed is, well I've grown up a bit, and my understanding of what living for God looks like has grown. 

The one calling that I know for certain is a part of my being is, being called to follow Jesus. After this, everything else comes second- or at least it should. In the midst of my weird place of transition, I think I have somehow allowed this understanding to become a little cloudy. Following Jesus is one of those things that in theory is "simple". Our goal is to seek the Lord, understand Him more and learn to love like Him- sounds simple (in theory). But then you throw in the icky ways of the world that tempt us, that we get sucked into and it all gets jumbled; we get confused, we get distracted, lazy, or just lose sight of what our first goal in life must always be.

So then what is my calling? Yes, it is to live to love like Jesus- and to share that love with others so that they might learn to love Him too. I understand that, I really do. But the beautiful thing is that we can do that with with any profession; so that's where I get confused. Straight out of college I went to work for a church. I worked with the college ministry and LOVED it. It challenged me, it made me take my faith super seriously, it made me who I am right now. But now, here I am, in a new place in life and asking that question all over again.

Over these past months, I think I've been too busy being either in denial or just plain lazy, afraid to admit the fact that I have no idea what's next- no idea where I'm being called. I haven't thought about the question seriously, haven't sought out the Lord's direction for me. Sure I've had some random thoughts, kind of out there ideas like starting my own Nail Art business (as you can see I have a blast with nail art), opening a shoe store, etc.  Besides those ideas, I'm a bit clueless right now.  So this is me, admitting to you that I think it's time to start asking that question again. I don't expect for immediate answers- definitely not, but I think I'm willing to start the adventure, to allow myself to dream big, and to trust that God will be right here with me helping me figure out what's next, whether its a big step or a small one.

Have you found where God is calling you for now? Or are you searching, just like me? Hang in there. God has a plan for this world, and He wants us to be a part of it. We just have to be willing to ride out the wave while we figure out what's next.